“Countdown”
Three Days To Go
“Tim, Tim, Tim. Your resistance is futile.”
“Oh. God. You’re insane!”
“Insanity is all in the perception, and stop evading.”
“You suck!”
“Insults will not deter me.”
“I can’t change the BMW production timetable! You’ll have to talk to Bruce!”
Dangled over Killer Croc, Tim, sans his mask but in uniform, struggled against the bonds that held him upside under the fearsome creature’s wide open mouth. To the side, Nightwing shook his head as he watched. “I can’t go to Bruce. Then he’ll know I found out my birthday present.” When Tim finally managed to get out of the knots, he plummeted toward Croc, who disappeared almost instantly. The lights flickered on in the “Kitchen” of the JLA Satellite, and the older brother walked over to give Tim a hand.
“I still can’t believe it’s on back order. How can a BMW bike be on back order?”
Ten minutes later, Tim slammed open the door to the monitor womb and stormed toward the Crays. “You owe me.”
Batman’s eyes never wavered from the screens. “What does he know?”
“He found the BMW papers and the back order form I created. Other than that, my heart will probably never beat the same way again. Thanks for that.”
Two Days To Go
Bruce smacked his elder son’s feet off the couch arm and swatted the younger man’s head with a newspaper. “Get your motorcycle out of the driveway.”
“That’s where you park a motorcycle,” Dick growled, dropping his socked feet to the floor. “You’re supposed to park in a driveway and drive on a parkway. Don’t complain to me about the irony.”
“Park it in the garage. There’s no need for it to be by the front door,” Bruce grumbled and sat down in the chair perpendicular.
“I came in the front door.”
“The oil will slick the driveway.”
“You’re a billionaire. You can have it repaved if you want.”
“It you don’t park in the driveway, then I won’t need to have it redone.”
Dick hit off the TV and scrunched his forehead. “Let me get this straight. You want me to get up after a long night of watching your stubborn ass which included even taking a bullet from Two-Face—”
“It didn’t break the Kevlar.”
“—just to park my bike in the garage only to take it out again in less than two hours when I have to take Tim to do some community service for Leslie?”
“You can take one of the Lamborghinis.”
Hopeless.
*^*^*
“I thought Bruce told you to put that in the garage.”
“He told me to get off the driveway, so I did,” Dick smirked as he tossed Tim one of the bike helmets.
Tim shook his head. “You put it on the front patio. He’s going to kill you once he sees it there.”
Dick snorted. “Oh, please. If I get oil on it, I’ll just blame you.”
“Oh, no. I’m in enough trouble as it is.” Tim zipped up his riding jacket and straddled the bike. “I still can’t believe he took away my wheels for something so trivial.”
“I still can’t believe he made you do community service. I thought the courts could only order that kind of thing.”
“Apparently, I need to ‘think about others and my impact upon their lives.’ What a crock.”
“What’d you do again?” Dick asked as he started the bike.
Tim rolled his eyes and pulled on his bike helmet. “I used the Batcomputer to set off all the fire alarms at my high school, so I didn’t have to run the mile in gym.”
“Morning after an Arkham breakout?”
“Yeah.”
Dick nudged the boy in the stomach with his elbow. “Nice! I wish I would have thought of that.”
“Yeah, but then you’d have to volunteer at Leslie’s clinic for the next four Saturdays.”
“Tim?”
“Yeah?”
“I’m driving you. You think Leslie’s just going to let me off the hook?”
*^*^*
The aroma of oranges and chicken wafted about the kitchen with just a dash of carrots as Dick slipped into a counter stool. He watched in silence for a few minutes as Alfred sautéed the chicken breasts and garnished the plates before raising his wise eyes with a suspicious glint.
“Master Richard, should I ask why you feel I need an audience this evening?”
“Alfred,” Dick began before narrowing his eyes, “we’ve been close for a while now, right?”
“I should bloody hope so.”
“And you know all the details of what goes on around here, right?”
“I should bloody hope so.”
“Then why the hell couldn’t Bruce get my BMW bike off back order? He’s Bruce Freakin’ Wayne. He could buy and sell BMW if he wanted.”
Alfred scooped some of the broth from the pan and pored it over the chicken. “I do not believe that ‘Freakin’’ is Master Bruce’s middle name.”
“You know what I mean.” The younger man propped his head on his hand. “Something’s going on here, Alfred. I know it. I just don’t know what yet.”
“Well, I assure you, you will not get any answers from me.” He lifted four dishes off the counter and almost dropped them all with one glance at the back patio. “Master Richard! Did you park your bike on the back patio?”
“Uh…no. Tim did?” He scooted out of the chair.
“Oh, no you don’t, young man. You move that dirty vehicle at once and put it where it belongs—in the garage.”
Dick let out a growling breath and headed outside. “Fine.”
One Day to Go
As Dick walked toward his room at the end of the hall, he passed Tim’s. The teen had his door wide open and his computer on on his desk just ready to be hacked.
“Tiiiim,” he called softly. “Can I look around your computer? Yeah? Okay!”
He eased inside the room, making sure no one occupied it before sitting down at the desk. He quickly scanned the first few files before hitting the browser. Man, the kid was boring. No dirty sites or chats that he could tease the boy about. The only blackmail material he could find was that Tim had hacked into the JLA systems to find out Bruce’s teleportation code. Yeah, like they all hadn’t done that once or twice.
Great, at this rate, Bruce would actually be able to surprise him this year.
Damnit.
“What are you doing?”
Dick cursed under his breath before whirling toward the newcomer. “Hey, Tim! I saw your wallpaper for this puppy, and I thought—”
“And you thought there was something on my computer that could help you find out your present.” Tim flopped down on his bed and shook his head. “Bro, you so suck this year.”
“I know, right? The BMW bike—That can’t be it, can it?”
“Well, you are totally going to need it. If Bruce catches your bike in the garden, is he going to blow a gasket.”
“Then he should let me park it in the driveway.”
“And maybe you should park it in the garage. Dude, why are you so against that?”
Dick smiled widely, now sitting backwards in the chair. “Because Bruce is so for it. It’s like his new life mission, and it’s just one more thing he thinks he can command me to do.”
Tim snorted. “Thinks?”
“Oh, you want to eat pillow, don’t you?”
*^*^*
Bruce’s study was off-limits. Not off, off-limits. He had been allowed free range of the manor at all times since he came to live there almost twenty years ago, but Bruce’s study was more like you-don’t-go-in-unless-you-have-a-reason-to-be-there. An unspoken rule for sure but one the occupants of Wayne Manor abided by.
So Dick was taking a big risk by turning the place completely over, and now, drained and grunting in Bruce’s chair, he decided to play dirty.
He picked up the phone and dialed a number by heart. Sure enough, the phone picked up before the first ring, much like when he called Wally. “Hello?”
“Hey,
CLICK!
He dialed a
different number. It was picked much slower. “Hey, Lois—Don’t hang up! I really
need to speak with
Lois sighed and directed the call to Clark, who replied, “Dick, this better be important.”
“It is. I found evidence to suggest that Bruce brought me a BMW bike for my—”
CLICK!
“How rude.”
“RICHARD!” blared through the house, and Dick leapt from the chair and out the sliding glass door as the shout continued, “GET THAT BIKE OUT OF THE FOYER!”
Dick’s Birthday
“So where is it?” Nightwing demanded as he threw his escrima stick and might have knocked out one of the Female Flurries if she were human. He pivoted on his back foot and delivered a swift kick to one’s shin, taking her down. “I know it can’t be on back order. That was a red herring Robin put up. That means you have to have it somewhere on the manor grounds.”
“This is what the JLA open frequency is being used for?” Green Lantern, Hal Jordan, laughed.
“Hey, it’s Darkseid’s fault. He’s the one who decided to invade on my birthday,” Nightwing replied, slamming his elbow into another flurry’s face. “Or maybe you want to blame Black Canary. She was the one who decided to call in the reserves.”
The flurry snatched his arm, and he cursed under his breath as she threw him into the wall of the hallway of the JLA Satellite. The attack didn’t seem like it was based upon the fate of the world at the moment, just the fate of the JLA. Darkseid deployed his deadliest assassins to kill the JLA, so there would be little resistance for his true invasion of Earth. Being the first on the reserve list, Nightwing went with Batman when he was called, and now he wiped the blood from the crack of his mouth as he slowly stood again.
Before him stood three more flurries—one with wings of ice and a skimpy suit that should not be worn in cold weather; another with a mouthful of vampire teeth and a black high heels up to her thighs; and the last a shimmering beauty with a silver bodysuit and twin blades to slice his body to shreds.
Oh, fun.
Nightwing took a defensive position and gave his most dangerous smirk. “Come on. Don’t stop the party now. I still have—” He pulled back his glove. “—twelve more hours.”
The fight grew long, and Nightwing’s suit grew less as the nails, blades, and even boots of the Flurries tore through the Kevlar. Blood leaked from his wounds, and exhaustion began to grip him.
“Report,” Batman commanded, and as the members called in—
“Outside the left quadrant—battling Kalibak.”
“Outrunning their speedster.”
“Fighting a Barda lookalike.”
Nightwing and the three flurries crashed through a wall and landed in the hanger.
“Oh. My. God.”
“Wing! You need help?” Red Arrow yelled into his ear.
Nightwing cursed, then brought his elbow down on the vampire’s neck. “I’m such an idiot! It’s in the garage!”
“Focus on the fight,” Batman commanded.
“Like hell! You kept it in the garage!”
Three hours later, bandaged and limping slightly, Dick followed behind Bruce and Tim along the driveway toward the garage. He slammed his hand into his forehead. “I still can’t believe it. I’m such an idiot. Here I thought you were just being your usual controlling pain in the you-know-what, but you knew if you pushed like this, I’d rebel just to piss you off, and I’d never go in there.”
“And you fell for it,” Tim laughed.
Dick narrowed his eyes before ruffling the boy’s hair. “Yeah, I did. I’m such an idiot.” As Bruce went to hit the remote to the garage opener, Dick clamped his hand over his father’s. “Wait. I want to try something.”
This was tricky, and if he got it wrong…
Dick put up his hands, interpreting Zantana’s magical powers. “WMB OT INIHGROBMAL!” Then he crossed his arms and leaned on his back foot. “Okay, now you can open the door.”
Sure enough, when Bruce opened the door, a black Lamborghini with blue trim sat in the middle stall of the garage.
Bruce let out a grunt. “You found out.”
Dick let his widest smile cross his
face. “Yeah, I did. I called all the major car companies and asked for the
status of the
“Then you don’t know Nightwing’s present.”
Dick blinked. “What?”
A hint of a smile crossed Bruce’s face. Yup, he had bested the younger man again. “This is Dick Grayson’s present. I also got Nightwing a present.”
“Say what?”
Less than an hour later, they stood
on Titans’
“A large T in the sky is a tactical disaster.”
“HEY!” Both Nightwing and Robin shouted, but Batman continued, “Which is why this time I had the compound built still in a T-shape but flat against the ground.”
“Wait. You had it built?” Nightwing repeated. “I don’t get it. We—The Titans—decided to sell the island as a college fund for Wally’s kids in case they accelerated too quickly. We sold it to some corporate giant—D.K. Enterpr—oh, shit.”
Batman led the boys inside. “Most of it is already furnished, including the bedrooms.” As they walked down the hall, each door had a member’s insignia, including the one at the end of the hall—Nightwing’s. “When construction finished almost a week ago, your team began to move in. The fact the Flash didn’t blurt this still surprises me, but…
“Happy birthday, Dick.”
“Hey, Bruce? Why is my door on the exact opposite end of Kory’s?”
Batman started toward the kitchen. “That’s a present to me.”
The End
Happy Birthday,